Planning ahead

Normally I am pretty good at planning ahead as far as anything new goes for Amy. However there have been some instances in which things have gone pear-shaped because of a lack of forward planning.

Today's gymnastics class went horribly wrong as a result of a lack of preparedness for Amy. It was her fourth class for her first term at gymnastics in a year or so. Although I'd taken her to gymnastics in the most recent school holidays, there wasn't a lot of structure within the school hol programme and she could pretty much do her own thing.

During the school term, however, the gymnastics classes are a lot more structured. They are forty-five minutes long and are divided into three obstacle courses around the gym followed by five or ten minutes of play. The obstacle courses change every week and this is one of several things which confuses Amy.

At her first session at the beginning of this term there were just four children in her class (including her) and one instructor. I did have to coax her back to join the group quite frequently, but all in all, the first session went well. The following week the class tripled in size and so the class was split into two groups with two instructors. Although this was somewhat confusing for Amy, she did really well joining her assigned group for most of the session.

Last week went really badly, however, because Amy decided the other group looked more interesting! I threatened to take her home if she didn't stay with her group to which she replied "I don't want to go home!!" and so rejoined her group. This happened several times.

Today was pretty much a repeat of last week except Amy really dug her heels in and wasn't at all keen to join her assigned group. Her behaviour was deteriorating so I took her home early. Although Amy on one hand didn't want to leave - she resisted leaving the gym and argued about it and even had a wee sob in the car - she actually was fine and even perhaps relieved to be out of the gym at the end of it all.

We know from a recent "sensory profile" put together recently by CDS (Child Development Services) that she has some big issues with overstimulation as far as the auditory side of things go. Two groups running at the same time, doing two different things in a gymnastics class is not the best set-up for Amy.

I took some photos of the session today and plan to write a social story about gymnastics so next time Amy will be a little bit more prepared for the session. I also spoke to one of the instructors and asked that Amy have the same instructor each week. Another possibility is shifting her to a class with just eight in it which means just one instructor and therefore just one group doing the same things at the same class in the gym.

It often takes Amy a good term to get used to doing something new. So it is very early days for her on the gymnastic front this time round. The thing is, she actually loves gymnastics - all that jumping, climbing and swinging is right up her ally. I just need so much patience and endurance as her Mum to take her there!

The next time I enrol Amy in something new, I will have a social story prepared beforehand. I went to a small meeting last night for "special children" which was run by a local social worker and psychologist - a husband and wife team. A lot of what they shared in the hour session I have heard, read or do already. But I was reminded how even if things run smoothly, the visual back-up ie: the social story, is so very important for these kinds of children. The anxiety levels are often high in social settings so every ounce of preparedness helps.

Amy is doing so well at Kindy. She is now eating lunch without me there. The Head Teacher at Kindy and I wrote a social story together around that one as Amy was not eating her lunch for a while there and running off and playing. Both the Head Teacher and myself were concerned a bad habit was been formed and that she would take this to school where her eating habits won't probably be so closed observed.

This last week we've had a big break-through on the toilet-training front: Amy did a couple of poos in the potty!! That is huge for us! I have been reading a couple of books around toileting-training kids on the autism spectrum and habitual training seems to be the way to go. Basically we will put a potty under Amy at assigned times and she will go wees. It is very rare that she will tell us she needs to go or that she will volunteer to go. Progress is slow on the toileting front but it's still progress!

Tomorrow morning I am meeting with some Mums I have met through Autism NZ to talk about getting funding for teachers aids for school. (Amy is due to start school April/Term 2 next year). I seem to be forming a wee support network with Mums of ASD/Asperger kids in the region. I went to the monthly Nelson Autism NZ meeting last week too which is always a good way to meet even more Mums who live locally.

Another thing that came out last night at the meeting of "special children" was how kids on the spectrum and kids with intellectual disabilities cannot be disciplined in the same way as "typical" kids. Don't I know that to be true! However, Amy still needs to learn about consequences so it was good to remove her from gymnastics today because she wasn't listening to her Mum and following the instructor as I asked her to. She understood. All parents have to choose their battles with their children. As an ASD Mum - it seems there are often more battles to deal with and many instances when negative behaviour is excused because Amy is trying to communicate. However today it felt good to win a battle with Amy! I understood her autism was causing her to feel overwhelmed - yet at the same time, she needed to learn that in gymnastics class you listen to the teacher or you leave.